May 6th

I read more in spite of my desire to put the concept of dreams away for awhile. Thought about people in comas. The subconscious weaves layers of complex fiction for people in long sleeps. The finite nature of normal, sleeping dreams can rarely demonstrate the actual power of the mind. People under heavy sedation dream for weeks. They can live years of mentally coherent but completely constructed existences, sometimes as other people and sometimes as themselves. Some describe years of happy, perfect lives with a beautiful family that doesn’t and never will exist. Others have unending nightmares, pursued through strange landscapes by creatures with no description. Some people won’t tell anyone what they saw. Many simply forget, like we do with most of our dreams. 

Is it better to forget a life of clarity that was never real, or to remember it in vivid detail? I don’t believe Freud’s dream theory accounts for dreaming outside of the traditional form, but it aligns all the same. Wish-fulfillment, and the cruel realization that we may see our wishes fulfilled, but not realized. We don’t miss it all, though. We don’t miss the nightmares. 

Nothing of note to talk about today. Started work on the new model of the QFC-235. Made reasonable progress. Couldn’t focus much. I’ll try to get some real, mindless sleep tonight.

Signed,
Dale R.